After the loss of a child, your friend may go through many stages of grief, just like she did during her pregnancy.
Grief can be overwhelming and scary, especially when you don’t know how to help someone going through it.
Help Your Friend Grieve After a Miscarriage
Here are three ways you can support your friend after she has miscarried, helping her get through this difficult time in her life with as much comfort as possible.
Support Them
Be there for your friend when they need you. Just because it’s not happening to you doesn’t mean that you can’t be there as support.
If they want to cry, let them cry. If they want to talk about what happened, lend an ear or give them space.
You don’t have to know what to say or do — but offering comfort is one of the most powerful things anyone can do after suffering a miscarriage, so long as they invite it and want it.
Try to refrain from giving advice. Sometimes people offer advice without realizing it, which can make someone who has just lost a baby feel like their situation isn’t valid.
Even if you think something might help, it’s best to ask before giving unsolicited advice.
There are some exceptions here, maybe your friend wants help with practical details such as how to deal with family members or where to find community resources.
But in general, just listen and acknowledge their feelings. It’s often better than trying to fix everything right away.
And remember: Just because you wouldn’t do something, in particular, doesn’t mean that others won’t find value in doing those same things!
Let Them Grieve
This can be tough if you’re not sure how long it should last. The best thing you can do is let your friend grieve in her own way and at her own pace.
You might want to talk about what happened, but try not to force it.
By asking your friend how she is feeling every now and then, you’ll be showing your care without pushing them for more than they are comfortable sharing with you.
It may also help to keep things light when talking about baby-related topics.
Everyone handles grief differently and by giving your friends space to work through their feelings on their own terms, you’ll be helping them get through an incredibly difficult time in their life.
Give Them Space
A friend experiencing a miscarriage will most likely want to be left alone for an extended period of time.
This can help them process what has happened and makes it easier for them to focus on healing.
Whether your friend is conscious of it or not, they’re going through something very real and very hard—give them space while they navigate their grief in their jown way.
They might need that space even if you feel like they’re starting to take it too far: let your friend know that you are there when they want support and don’t push them into talking before they are ready.
The more space your friend has, the better—for both of you.
Even when there is space between you, you can still show love and support from afar.
Sending a gift for miscarriage can come in many forms.
A floral arrangement, their favorite take-out meal, or their groceries delivered to their front door can be a big gesture and will let her know that even though you’re giving her the space she needs, you’re a phone call away if she needs you.
The only way to help your friend through her grief is by staying in touch, offering physical and emotional support, and being there for her.
Whatever you do, don’t hesitate to reach out it’s never too soon to show support.